What would I pack if I knew I would be stranded on a desert island?
Hmm.. first I thought I would do the smart thing and pack some can food, rope, knives, lighters, can opener, books, an umbrella, a few changes of clothes, blow up mattress, a blanket and pillow, tent, and the basic necessities of life.
Than I realize nope in real life I am not that smart. No, my short stent on a deserted island would look more like this.
Packed: Book, cell phone, blanket, pillow, and a box of granola bars.
Events of Me on My Imaginary Deserted Island
Arrival day: Excited about the possibility of some “me” time.
45 mins later: Bored of self and reading this book.
1 hour later: Throw book as far out into ocean as can. Take a Nap.
That Night: Can’t sleep because of nap and scared whit-less due to jungle night sounds.
Next day: Granola bars gone. Hunt for food. Starting to feel the internet addiction withdraw.
Lunch time: Found berries but too scared to eat them without the ability to google them to see if they are poisonous.
Evening: Getting kinda sick of self and talking to the rocks in the ground. Rosie doesn’t talk back.
Night: Sleep from sheer exhaustion and hunger.
Next day: Using cell phone to beat open a coconut more out of punishment to it because it doesn’t work. Angry at Rosie because she is ignoring me.
Lunch: Stuff face with berries hoping they are poisonous.
Mid Day: Lack of social interaction and frequently available internet information causes a mental melt down and the berries really were poisonous…
I would make it a total of 3 days before complete mental shut down.
I guess it’s a good thing there are places that make survival kits for those of us who have NO survival skills.